journaling- july 2010

time for a journal update!  i can hardly believe that in a couple days my little tyson is going to be four weeks old!  time sure does fly.  time to do document all that is happening!  (hopefully i can do this once a month!)

breastfeeding
the history- when i was pregnant with porter there was no question that i was going to breastfeed him.  he arrived in all his glory at a whoppin' 8lbs 11 ounces with the chunkiest little cheeks you've ever seen.  he was such a happy and content little guy, it appeared that nursing him was going great. his first checkup with the pediatrician was at 3 weeks old.  he weighed in more than a pound less than his birth weight.  the doctor didn't seem overly concerned, but told me that i needed to offer him formula after each feeding to try and get his weight back up.  two weeks later it was clear to me that he was getting mostly formula so i began seeing lactation specialists.  i learned so much!  they were having me taking herbal supplements and feeding or pumping every hour.  it was one of the most emotional and stressful experiences, mainly because i had to eventually accept that my baby was not going to be able to breastfeed.  i wondered often if i had implemented all the lactation people had taught me from day 1 instead of beginning at week 5 if i would have had a different outcome.  that curiosity naturally drove me to want to try at breastfeed baby 2, knowing i may experience the same heart ache all over again.
this time around- tyson arrived weighing just 7lbs. i felt like a first time mom again and worked with every nurse and lactation specialist that would help me figure it out in the hospital.  my first couple days in the hospital i only got about 3 hours of sleep at night, and i was feeling overly tired.  i had a breakdown when a nurse suggested at only day 2 that i give him formula.  tyson was doing really well it seemed at nursing, but i didn't want to make the same assumption like i did with porter that everything was ok.  after discussing my history and concerns with the doctors we came up with a plan to help us document tyson's progress and help us to make the most educated decision about whether it was safe to continue breastfeeding without any supplements.  our plan was as followed: weigh him at: birth, hospital discharge, 1 week, 2 weeks, 3 and 4 weeks.  that was even if he wasn't back to his birth weight at 2 weeks we would have other numbers to help us know if he is either gaining, or continuing to lose.  i rented a hospital grade pump and signed up with another lactation specialist. the weigh-ins have gone as followed: birth- 7lbs, discharge 6 lbs 7 ounces, 1 week- 6lb, 6 and 3/4 ounce, 2 weeks- 7lbs, 3 weeks- 7lbs 5 ounces.  he is doing great, and is gaining just as he should.  i am dealing with cracking and bleeding, and sleep deprivation... but i hear that is normal. :)

me and my body
i was really excited in the hospital to see the immediate difference in my body after having a baby.  my friends, there is a big difference in gaining 30 lbs and gaining 50 lbs!  i am confident that my tummy was smaller when i left the hospital than it was 6 months after porter was born. my last weigh-in was at 2 weeks when i went to the gym for the 1st time.  i had lost 18 lbs, and had 12 lbs left to lose.  even with the obvious improvements i still have a little bit of a tummy, and even though i can pull my jeans on i can't seem to button them and they are a bit tight.  i find myself doing lunges in jeans, and i am pretty sure i will like you more if you know what i am talking about. i live in my work out clothes, even though i don't live at the gym.  time to cut out the sweets and hit the treadmill.

adjusting to 2
first off, prayer works!  so porter did great with the adjustment at first, especially when he had my parents here spoiling him with lots of attention.  after they left, he slowly began showing some signs of jealousy.  i feel like i have been the biggest nag to him, telling him no constantly- no throwing toys, no jumping on the couch, no touching tyson's eyes, no screaming... that kind of thing.  soon it seemed like if i told him no to something he would do it more, or would start doing something else we told him he wasn't allowed to do.  he was wanting attention and was determined to get it, even if it was "bad attention".  he was having to go to time out often.  one day we were upstairs and he began pushing me towards my room saying "go into your room mom!"  i walked that way wondering what he wanted?  i was thinking he wanted a bath.  then as soon as i walked into the room, he stayed in the door way and began pointing his finger and mimicking me:  "you be nice!  do you want to go to time out?  you not be nice, so you go to time out!" it was the funniest thing and made me laugh, but it also broke my heart that i really was having to nag him so much.  when jared was gone for football camp i found my patience with him growing very thin.  i began praying for more love and patience with him, and to know how to help him adjust and feel needed and loved.  we still have occasional issues but there has been a big improvement... whether with him, or with me knowing how to handle it... that i haven't figured out yet.  the Lord is definitely helping us out!

single mom week
jared is coaching football for timpanogos high school this year, and summer is the not-so fun part!  this week was football camp.  they stayed in a small city down south.  he did come back for a day to celebrate his 31st birthday, but for a couple days i got to experience being a single mom.  i wouldn't recommend it! :)  we made it bearable by staying busy!  we had three birthday parties, play dates, swimming, movies, etc.  today we are at home and porter keeps coming up to me and asking "what are we going to do today, mom?"  jared is back home, and life is good! ps: also the week my dishwasher broke... lovely!

baby tyson
i save the best for last.  wow, what a joy this little guy is!  he has been such a happy baby, smiling at us from almost day 1!  every morning after i feed him he rewards me with 5-10 minutes of big smiles.  just the other day he got the hiccups, and when i began copying him he dissolved into lots of giggles!  too cute!  he already rolls over from back to tummy.  i have found him a couple nights rolled over to his tummy and looking like he's in heaven.  (yeah, a little scary!)  he does great in the car, loves taking baths but hates getting out in the cold air.  already is acting like a mama's boy... i don't mind, porter's always been a daddy's boy.