2 Weeks Left

Have you ever googled ways to self induce labor?  I have recently.  I am too chicken to do any of it.  But I find myself willing my body to do something like have my water break or something.  It isn't listening to me though.  Last week when I went to the doctor I told him about the contractions and pressure.  It happened to be the only week they planned on checking me since they already had to do the strep b test.  He said I was dialated to a 2 and 50% effaced, but the reason for the pressure was that he could feel his head already!  Apparently he is way down there.  Sometimes I think I look like I am walking as if there is a head between my legs.  My back aches a lot these days.  Saturday I got a lot of housework done around the house.  Everything cleaned.  My windows washed inside and out, weeds pulled, yardwork done, floors swept and mop, vacuumed, laundry done.  It has been my goal to just keep the house in order so that when the time comes I will leave a clean house.  But there are some days when I don't feel like bending over to pick up the toys.  And I don't.  But the day usually doesn't end before I freak myself out that THIS would be the day my water would break and I would have to leave a messy house... and it gets me off my butt.  Last week I took the entire week off from the gym.  During that week I took Porter to the dinosaur museum, and I took him swimming twice.  It was workout enough for me.  When I went to the doctors last week I was really dissapointed and frankly nervous about my weight gain.  I had reached 30 lbs, which is what I thought I would gain all together.  It is still possible, since last time I weighed the same the last three weeks, and according to my pregnancy book is normal to weigh the same the last few weeks.  I am trying to eat better, and today I forced myself to go to the gym.  If there is one last goal in this whole thing it is to not go over that number.  I was excited when I went to the gym to learn that I lost two pounds!  So if I am careful I think I can still get away with my goal.  It would be much easier to achieve if I just went into labor today.  :)  I've thought all along that my stomach was so much smaller than it was last time.  But, I don't feel "small" anymore.  I feel big.  Yesterday at church I wasn't feeling the best.  I sat in sacrament and didn't fight my child like I normally do.  He was singing songs and talking loud, and I didn't even care.  I just ignored him and listened to all the testimonies.  Then he managed to squeeze past me out of the pew.  He went to the bench in front of us and played peek-a-boo with the lady sitting there.  Again, I didn't want to move, and I didn't.  "He's fine," I told myself.  And I believed it.  Until, he started to walk back and waved at us and said "Bye".  I then knew I was in trouble.  I got up to get him and he ran as fast as he could to the back of the room, turned right and went back up the chapel on the opposite side.  He can run fast, and there was no way I was going to run after him now or ever, but especially now being 38 weeks pregnant.  He ran up to the stage, across the chairs, and started jumping down the stairs.  Jared and I were giving evil eyes to each other, willing the other to go get him.  I won.  There were chuckles all around me, and even the bishop made a comment when he was closing the meeting.... I was embarrassed.  Any way, I am officially ready for this little boy to come.  I am ready phsycially, emotionally, etc.  There is something about the last couple weeks when you know it could be "any day now" that makes it go by so slow.